Instant Turn Off.

Mr UK once said that part of my appeal lies in the fact that I am clean and wholesome, but at the same time utterly, utterly filthy. I really questioned that statement, until this morning's random PoF IM conversation.

The guy had contacted me, and we'd been chatting for twenty minutes about travel and hobbies. He was looking like a potential candidate. Then he switches conversational gears:

"has anyone ever told you that you've got great lips?"
(I was cueing up the Deliverance banjos when I saw that...'you sure got a purdy mouth, boy)
(**and when I was a kid, the other kids called me 'nigger lips'. Thank God for Angelina. She made me sexy.**)

"um...yeah..."

"Can't take a compliment, huh? You know, you are really sexy."

"look, i gotta go get ready for work."


I know I am really sexy. I know a lot of guys think I am hot. I have absolutely no doubt about those sorts of things. I have no problem accepting compliments, either. But, you know, I find it incredibly offensive when people who don't know anything about me say those things out loud. It seems crass, somehow.

It must be my feminist upbringing. I don't want to be anybody's sex object, period. Now, someone who appreciates my intelligence and personality...well, that's a different story. If Mr UK told me I had really sexy lips, I'd start describing how I intended to use those sexy lips on his cock the next time I saw him. Graphically.

But then, Mr UK sees me as a whole person, maybe a sex subject, a parnter in crime, so to speak, but certainly not an object. Part of the reason he finds me sexually attractive is because he is drawn to who I am. My personality. My goals and accomplishments. The stuff you can't see. It's about more than just what I look like. And, I see him the same way. I'm comfortable with him.

Wholesome and filthy. Yeah, I guess I can see it...